I was seriously just asking God why my one friend was getting on my nerves and i was trying to think if it was because i was jealous of her in some way…but i really didnt think i was. and then i was sitting upstairs listening to them all talk and it hit me.  and this may not really be the reason i’m annoyed with her…but it’s still something i realized.     I realized from her, and her past, and who she is now…How Amazing my Mother is. I definitely never appreciated my mom enough for all the things she let me do or taught me about life. and i’ll even admit that i wasnt one of those girls who genuinely thought my mom was a hero. But thats not the case now.

Now i see how good of a mother my mom was. She spent most of my childhood as a stay at home mom. She gave up teaching when she moved to California and had me. She was the mom who watched me and my cousins and my friends. She was our team mom for basketball. She let me have sleep overs and hang outs. She drove me all over the place for basketball practice and games and tournaments. She loved me and encourages me when i feel like i can’t do something. She’s the one i call when i need to vent about life. She’s the one i call when i’m excited about some random little news. She’s the one who helps me think things through. She’s taught me what it looks like to walk with the lord. She’s an amazing servant who is continually learning more about Christ’s love and shares it with others. I can honestly say that my Mom is my hero. and I hope to be as good of a mother as she is.

<3

i’ve got homework…but i dont want to do it….and so i just want to go on Facebook…but i know i shouldnt. AHHH it just makes me want to cry. ok not really….but it is really sad. and its sad that its killing me. bleh.

Alright…well i should be going to the womens leadership meeting….but i have a stupid group project that i havent worked on and i have stuff due tomorrow…plus i have to make a model. school sucks. But i met up with my roommate from last year and she reminded me that were here for a reason. God has us here right now for a reason.

oh yea…and i need to work on my list of what i want in a guy…and what i think guys are looking for in a girl. i’m kinda excited to actually write out a list and stick to it. i want to see who God has in store. haha.

love LOVE love

kinda sad. now its back to school and real life…Bleh.

oh well…break was fun got to show the girls around my home and tan and just hang out. i’m not sure how relaxing it was….i did have to play host and do a lot of driving…but it was fun. so i guess thats what matters. haha.

now that i’m back to school i realize how much i do like being here. even though the weather can be crappy…i do enjoy living in fort collins. and even though at times i think i want to change my major…i still enjoy designing floor plans. then of course theres all the friends i’ve made…i’m not ready to give them all up.

anyways…i’m done for the day…I’ve got this weird sharp shooting pain in my head behind my ears that i’m going to go research. Peace

i had gone out on a date with this guy. and he was a total creeper. then at the end of the night he took me home [which for some reason was a mix between a hotel and an apartment]. he wanted to come up…but i told him no. and then when i finally got into my apartment i went to my room [i think] but got the feeling that someone else was there. SO i rush back out to the front door and i see that its open. I PANICKED! but then as i close it there are these 2 other guys [for some reason they weren't "bad" guys, they just arent exactly good...and they weren't supposed to be there..i can't remember who they are...(but i think it was an actor from a tv show or movie or something. and its really bugging me that i cant remember. AHH he's got brown hair and a beard)..and they're twins. ok whatever...moving on] So they totally scared me because i didnt know they were there. and the neighbor across the hall asks if i’m alright…and i tell her yea…i just freaked out cuz the door was open and i was afraid that they guy from my date was there. After she goes back to her apartment…the 2 guys start talking to me. they tell me a little of how they got there and why and stuff…and then we start to watch a movie…But its interupted by one of their ex-girlfriends. [somehow she climbed through the window...but i'm pretty sure we were on the 31 floor] and for some reason i dont like her…but her and a couple of friends end up staying for the movie…AND somehow…somewhere my friends little sister came into the picture. and there was something about camera memory cards…and Then i woke up.

IT WAS SOOO RANDOM!
Sometimes i definitely feel like my imgination leaks into my dreams. [like in that phase where you're not exactly sleeping...but your not awake.] And i find that i dream/think in terms of scary movies/thrillers. haha. alright…

Great way to start your day.
Happy Superbowl. May your favorite team win.
(or at least watch some good commercials)

so i have the 3 park pass, but i havent gone yet! i really wanted to go. and i was supposed to go tomorrow…BUT people are such flakes sometime and it really bugs me.
I’m one of those people who likes to make plans, but at the same time i hate making plans because i feel that everyone else is so wishywashy and then it sucks to try to make plans when they’re not commited to them. AHH!!!!!!!!

ok..anyways…that was my very mini rant. :p

so does anyone want to go boarding soon?
i wanted to go for my birthday…but i’m going to be going on a retreat for APASS…because i just got a job with them next year…so i should go. BUT…
How about the 15th? Let me know

Break: went home…spent Christmas with the family. Nothing too exciting. i got new snowboard pants and some other little things….and then i bought myself new snowboard boots (and at the end of break my grandma bought me my new winter jacket for my birthday) Then New Years Eve i hung out at my friends house. It was a little weird cuz it was with my friends from home who i havent seen in a while and everyone’s soo different now [in a good way]. like all the guys who i grew up with are a little more responsible and…nice. haha it’s different. The rest of break i didnt do anything really. haha i did some tanning in my backyard and read Pride and Prejudice. went to the beach with friends. ate good food. [In and Out, Tommy's, Corner bakery, real Chinese food, and of course home cooking] watched my high school team. and just hung out.

I also got to go to the EPIC conference [EPIC is the asian ministry of campus crusade] the last weekend before school. It was in San Fran. I flew up early on Friday so i could hang out with my friend Alex and then we met up with others at the hotel. [which was the Marriott and it was gorgeous!] The weekend was really cool. I’d compare it to DCC but for asian students on the west coast. haha. For me it was really fun because i got to see all my friends from Summer Project AND my friends from my home church and camp. our speakers were Sabastian Hyunh and Steve Lo. They were great. the theme was Kingdom Come [oh and my Summer project student directors were our emcees so that was cool too] and we talked about how we are FREE and should stand firm in Christ not on the things we do, our IDENTITY in Christ and what that means, and GOING OUT and sharing God’s Love with everyone [orphans, widows, poor and weak]. we did our day of Outreach in different parts of San Fran…I was in Union Square. It was good…i got to know my partner a little better and then went out and talked to some interesting people. most people didnt want to talk to us…but we kept asking people and met people who were all in different stages of their life. it was challenging but great to see how God can use us. Unfortunately the conference had to end [which was kinda good cuz i was getting NO sleep haha] and back to school it was.

So now i’m back. I’m glad its not snowing yet…cuz i dont think i could have handled the weather change. But its been ok being back. I got picked up by some friends [heard all the recent drama] stopped by their place and then finally made it back to my apartment. where….i met my new roommate. i wont say to much about who she is [because i dont think its very nice to post info about someone else] but so far things are good. we’re both cool with being friends and get along but we both have our own things going on in life too. It’s a good combo. lets hope things stay good. haha.

as for school….eh. its school. haha. i was late to my first class on both Tuesday and Wednesday. not by much…like 10 mins. haha and luckily i’ve had these teachers before [cuz they're classes for my major] so it was ok. I’m not sure if i’m going to be super stressed this semester…but i bet i will be. haha. i’m just good at procrastinating and leaving it till the end…but hopefully i dont do that that much. My schedules pretty free right now…its kinda weird. but i still need to find a job for the semester so we’ll see what happens.

Alright…well that was a nice long post…i’ll try to update more often.

Loves <3